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Grief is grief


I recently had a long-term relationship fall apart. My head was spinning and I was trying to make sense of everything. I have a long-term friend who is struggling with severe mental illness. I felt like I had lost her forever. It reminded me of how I was trying to make sense of Wolfgang’s sudden and tragic death the days after he died. Pet loss is hard, but really any type of grief, shock and trauma are very stressful for our brains and bodies. I actually got sick over it. I think that my immune system was just not able to do its job with the stress and I got a cold.

I think the way that my head was spinning, and how I found it really difficult to focus, I would have reached for a drink if I was not a sober person. It seems like the normal solution for many people. Instead, I tried to reason with myself that “This too, shall pass”. I have gone through tough things before and even though I could not change her/the situation, I could take care of myself. I practiced self care, gave myself downtime to process, journaled, meditated, saged my house, listened to positive speakers on YouTube and knew that I would eventually feel better.

I did many of these same things after I lost my pet. The difference is that I did not know that I would get better. I am lucky that I have tools to deal with struggles and challenges. Many of the things I wrote in the Wolfie’s Wish Grieving Cards are true for general life.

Whatever you are struggling with, there is help for you. Don’t give up and don’t hide your feelings. They are valid and tell us where we need to grow. I believe in you!

If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health issues, please find the help that is needed. This link is a great start.


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